letting go

We finally faced the dreaded task last weekend and cleaned out the loft.

It was pretty miserable, dusty, dirty work but it needed to be done. With children coming and going, moving in and moving out, the loft was filled to the brim with all sorts and it had become impossible to locate the last few Christmas decorations. So, I announced a family work day with the promise of pizza reward.

If your family is anything like ours, clutter is a constant battle. As soon as you clear a surface in the house, it seems to instantly become a magnet for keys, post, phones and pretty much anything else that needs a home.

And there are other kinds of clutter. We can pile up unmade decisions or unresolved conflicts. Too many commitments or projects can squeeze the life out of our routines until they are joyless. And of course, worries, fears and negative thoughts often clutter our minds and drown out God’s voice.

Don’t be fooled, clutter is nothing but a thief. It steals our time and our attention, clogging up closets and minds. It distracts and derails us. It burdens us and pulls us down.

And, Christmas is no exception.

When clutter fills our holidays, what is really important can disappear under a pile of festive jumble.

But we can fight it if we want to.

And we can start by saying no. Over Christmas the invitations are endless. So is the list of things we think we ‘have to do’. It is impossible to do it all so we must learn to be selective. What is most important and what can you just leave out this year? What gives you joy and fills you up? What do you dread? There are, of course, responsibilities and commitments that are non-negotiable but there are also things we do that are unnecessary and just serve to wear us out. I love receiving Christmas cards but I find it very hard to organize myself to send them, so I don’t. For years the kids and I would have a big all day baking marathon. It was so much fun but now they are all working and busy so we had to let it go. My girlfriends and I often wait until January for a big get-together. It is a fun event to look forward to and one less item to fit into the Christmas calendar. What can you leave out this year or reschedule for the New Year that will free up some time and space in your schedule and in your heart?

Then, resist the hype. Every advert on the television, daytime tv slot or magazine cover tells you that Christmas has to be perfect and that it has to be expensive. Don’t listen, it isn’t true. It is meaning that makes celebrations special, not matching baubles or a perfect party outfit. Most of my decorations are quite old now, but they are filled with memories, like the mugs that Paul and I were given on our first Christmas after we were married or the Christmas quilt the women in my family made together years ago.

So, this year, look the culture square in the eye and swim upstream. De-emphasize perfection and acquisition. Emphasize the unseen virtues of tradition and generosity of spirit. Be different. Celebrate Christmas in a way that gets you noticed. Travel light and be a light.

And learn to love simplicity. Christmas lunch doesn’t need dozens of side dishes. It really doesn’t. Streamline it down to the most popular elements. Make the table pretty and then enjoy. If you really love baking and have time then go for it, but if not, don’t sweat. I now make just three cookie recipes every year and then I buy stolen and Italian panettone. That’s it. Boring maybe, but it saves me overspending and overeating and frees up time to just be with people I love. I don’t need to be a martyr to an endless supply of baked goods or a gourmet lunch.

The key with Christmas is to include what is important and then to be brave enough to let the unnecessary go.

So, think before you buy. As we are trying to clear our own lives of clutter, let’s not contribute to anyone else’s. Spend much more time thinking about what to give and less time walking around the shops, dazed and desperate. I find myself favouring gifts that are perishable much more now and I try and avoid anything that will need storage or dusting. Gourmet food, toiletries, candles or gift vouchers for activities like the cinema have become my go-to’s. If in doubt, just ask and save yourself from wasteful guesses. Let’s be honest, most of us don’t need any more knick-knacks.

Then, make time for quiet. In order to enjoy the spiritual aspects of this season, we have to make room to think and to meet with God. I like to get up early before my young adults have emerged, and sit by the tree with my Bible. There is something so important about worshipping first before the craziness of the day starts. I also take any chance I am given to get outside and just walk. I have learned this tip from the British and there is no better way to balance out the overdose of chocolates and mince pies. A brisk walk somewhere beautiful is a very good way to clear mental clutter. It can put things in perspective and still our souls. Without these moments of escape, we run the risk of starting the New Year with ragged emotions and tired hearts.

And finally, make space for loving people. Over Christmas, we will inevitably be spending time with people we find difficult or with whom we have a strained relationship or just clashing personalities. Instead of accepting the awkwardness and enduring it, how about approaching it with prayer? Praying now for those we will be seeing over the holidays in the days leading up to our get-togethers is so powerful. It makes space in our hearts for love for family members or colleagues and it has the power to change and heal situations.

People are what matters, so make relationships the priority.

Decide today that Christmas will be clutter free. Be brave enough to let the tinsel go and fill the days with only the good stuff.

Enjoy it. Do what you love. Do what matters. Play games and laugh. Kiss your husband. Be generous with words and smiles and time and attention. Read the Chrismas story. Wonder at His love for humanity. Weep at His love for you.

The recipe for a good Christmas isn’t rocket science. Start every day with worship and end it with gratitude. And, fill the middle with love.

There is one thing I know I am doing right.

That’s what the Apostle Paul tells the believers in Philippians 3.13.

I like Paul. He wasn’t afraid to use dramatic language when it was appropriate. Having spent the previous verses sharing how he was wrong for much of his life, how he had completely misunderstood who God was and what He was doing in the earth, he then boldly makes this statement:

‘I don’t mean to say I am perfect. I haven’t learned all I should even yet, but I keep working toward that day when I will finally be all that Christ saved me for and wants me to be. No, dear brothers, I am still not all I should be, but I am bringing all my energies to bear on this one thing’ Phil. 3.12-13a (NLT)

And what is this one thing?

‘Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I strain to reach the end of the race and receive the prize for which God is calling us up to heaven because of what Christ Jesus did for us.’ Phil. 3.13b-14

Paul always shows us how to keep the main thing the main thing. And he says here that if we are Christians, this is a top priority.

It is interesting that he calls it ‘one thing‘ although it has two parts. There is forgetting what is behind us and then straining towards what is ahead. I wonder if Paul calls them ‘one thing’ because you can’t have one without the other.

Think about it. You can’t really strain forward if you are looking back, can you? It is pretty hard to focus on something you aren’t looking at. You can’t win a race facing the wrong way.

I should know, I have tried.

So often in my life I have attempted to follow Jesus with all my attention on the baggage I was dragging behind me. And so often my run has become a crawl. It was tiring and needlessly hard, frustrating and disheartening. Because it is hard to follow Jesus well with old thinking, old habits and old perspectives.

There are things I have to take off if I am serious about this race.

If you are a fan of elite sport, you will know how minute the margins are between winning and losing, often only fractions of a second. Olympic teams will have many experts working for them, looking for any tiny adjustment that can be made in technique or diet or equipment.

Paul describes it as, ‘bringing all my energies to bear on this one thing.’

That’s the only way to run this race well.

In Hebrews 12.1 we see the picture of a runner who is free and unencumbered. He is focused, lean and mean. Anything surplus to requirement has been discarded. He is single minded and he is ready for the start line.

But often in my life regrets, disappointment, hurt, brokenness and destructive ways of thinking and behaving have been like bungee cords that hampered my forward progress and eventually pinged me back into defeat. When I am not walking in repentance, forgiveness, mercy and grace I am not free to run well.

To move forward, I have to leave things behind.

And the reverse is also true. I cannot leave the past behind unless I am intentionally moving forward.

In my favourite passage in the Bible, Psalm 84, David says that ‘blessed are those whose strength is in You, whose hearts are set on pilgrimage. They go from strength to strength. For the Lord God is a sun and a shield. No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly.’

When we decide that our identity is that of pilgrims or travellers who are heading towards our home, then we will leave behind what we don’t need. There is a strength that comes when we focus on our destination and believe it to be all that really matters. There is a forward momentum that kicks in and propels us into all God has planned for us. He promises to withhold no freedom, no deliverance, no victory from those kind of followers.

In other words, if we keep going we will get there.

2 Corinthians 5.17 describes the very essence of the Christian life. ‘Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come.’

Every day His mercies are new. New things are always coming, old things are passing away. This is the normal Christian life. We are constantly letting go and reaching forward at the same time. Sometimes the Holy Spirit shows us something that we have to leave behind. It can be painful but it always makes room for new blessings and revelation. Other times God encourages us to walk in a new way of thinking or living and in the process some old stuff just gets crowded out.

I want that heart, that outlook, every day of my life. I want the grace to keep straining, pulling, moving forward. I want to let go of anything that is holding me back or slowing me down. I want to shed my baggage, maybe close a door or two and I want to make space for God to do something new.

I want to make space for His will and His presence in my life.

I want to listen and obey. I want to know what really matters. I want to be facing the right way and I want to finish my race with joy. I want to make progress.

I want to be a pilgrim.