Silver medal sadness

 

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A recent scientific study has found that Olympic athletes that win silver medals die younger than those who win either gold or bronze.  There is something about being so close to gold and just losing out that takes it toll on minds and bodies.

Dissatisfaction can kill you.

There is a kind of disappointment that seeps into your bones. There is a longing that will eat you up.  Proverbs 13.12 calls it deferred hope and it makes us sick.

Expectations are powerful.  I have seen Olympic competitors who were not expected to win a medal celebrate their surprise silver like it was gold..  And I have seen world champions miss out on gold by the smallest margins, their faces full of shock and sadness.

It is all about the expectation.

Sometimes things don’t work out as we had hoped.  Sometimes people let us down.  Sometimes we make assumptions about what God is doing in our lives and we are wrong. Sometimes we are misunderstood and sometimes we fail.

These dashed hopes will drag us to the bottom if we can’t let them go.  Like ageing sports stars we can live a life of what might have been as the regret sickens our souls.

Of course, desires are normal.  Wants and wishes are part of being human. The problem is when desires turn into expectations.

We can have expectations of others that are unspoken or unfair.  We can have expectations of life that are unrealistic.  We can expect to find value and meaning in ways that can never satisfy.  But these great expectations lead to great disappointment.

Be careful where you plant your deepest longings.

Always expect less of people and more of God.

Jesus says in John 6.35 that those who come to Him will never thirst.  My Bible dictionary defines thirst as to ‘painfully feel the want of the things by which the soul is refreshed’

When we walk with Jesus, we can be free from painful wantings.  He promises that He is always, in every situation, enough.  

Like the determined athlete who uses disappointment as motivation for next time, we must move on from life’s let-downs and press forward for what matters.

So, put the silver medal in the drawer.  Put to bed the things that didn’t work out like you thought they would.  Forgive.  Forget.

We are called to run a race that has eternal value.  We were created to be satisfied with nothing less. We have been given everything we need to finish this race well so let us expect to.  Let us expect to live a life of spiritual success that fills heaven with treasures.

I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection.  But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me.  No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing:  Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lied ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.’  Philippians 3.12-14

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Its OK to stop

A few years ago our family decided to hike up to the top of Mount Snowdon in North Wales.  It was a beautifully warm August day and the conditions were perfect.  The path that we chose gently inclined and the scenery was beautiful.  It was all so pleasant, so easy.

243529_608306497399_1559077759_oThen our way took a turn and I found myself hiking/scrambling straight up a verticle trail.  I needed all my strength just to keep up with the others and within an hour my legs just gave out.

They felt like jelly and I couldn’t take another step without risking a fall.  At this point, a little panic took over.  My teenagers had jogged to the top already and were looking down wondering what was going on.  I could see the end of the trail and the top of the mountain but I couldn’t think of any way to get myself there.  Unfortunately, going down the mountain was also out of the question.  I was well and truly stuck.

So I did the only thing I could do, I sat down.  I drank some water and had my protein bar and laughed a little.  And do you know what?  In half an hour I was at the top.

To live life carefully in this world, we need to know when it isn’t safe to take another step.  

We need to know when to be careful with ourselves.

There are times when disappointment or loss leave us wobbly.  Shaky souls need time to recharge in God’s presence and refuel in His Word.  Life decisions can wait. This is not the moment to try and figure everything out!  Worship first and then you will be ready to walk.

Know yourself well enough to recognize spiritual and emotional fatigue so that you make time to rest and recover.

Allowing ourselves to stop means that before we know it we will be back on our feet and hiking to the top of that particular mountain.

If this is you today, if you need rest and encouragement and renewed hope, please know that it is okay to stop as long as you know where to sit.

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Detours, disappointment and delays

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You’ve heard of twice-baked potatoes and triple-fried French fries, well this is a twice-written blog post.

Each week I set aside a day for writing and I am often working on several blog entries at once.  I work a little on each one and then try to plan the order in which to post them.

As I have meditated on Ephesians 5.15-17 and thought about how to make the most of every opportunity, it occurred to me just how often opportunities come wrapped in disappointments, detours or delays. 

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So, I’ve been working on this idea and developing thoughts and words to express it.

And then I had some bad news.

It quickly reminded me just how hard disappointment is and I knew I had to rewrite this post with the authenticity that life handed me.

Defeat, failure and bad news can have tremendous power in our lives.  They have the ability to knock us sideways and derail our thoughts and emotions.

Proverbs 13.12 describes this feeling well when it says, ‘Hope deferred makes the heart sick but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.’

Every person knows what that kind of heartsickness feels like.  It is that awful pain in your soul that occurs when things that really matter haven’t turned out how you wanted them to.

I feel all those feelings today.  I feel defeated and discouraged and worn out.   And most of all,  I feel like giving up.

But I have been here before, as the pages of my journal remind me.  I have faced challenging circumstances that were hurtful and hard to understand and I have faced disappointments that were devastating. And every single time, without exception, I was able to eventually see God use it all for good in my life.

It is because I am so deeply loved by God that He intervenes and interferes and gets right in the middle of my business.

Because sometimes my good ideas need to be refined and sometimes my bad ideas need to just fizzle out. Sometimes dreams need to drift away because God has better, more perfect plans.  Other times dreams have to die so God can resurrect them in His timing and for His glory.  Sometimes the direction I am walking in needs a small tweak and sometimes it needs a complete U-turn.

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And sometimes I just need to grow roots deep down in God and only difficulties will do that for me.

It is interesting that Proverbs 13.12 says that after the disappointment, when God’s blessings come, the result is a tree of life.

I am wondering today if it is difficulties in my life that produce the roots needed to support times of blessing and growth in the future.   Perhaps it is only in waiting on God and trusting in Him that I am prepared for the increase and abundance that will come.

None of this means it doesn’t hurt.  It just means there is purpose in it.

There are things God is doing that you and I just can’t see yet.  I believe there are solutions and answers that will surprise us and there are new directions we couldn’t have imagined. And, in the midst of loss, when you least expect it, supernatural life can spring up.

And all the while we find ourselves falling deeper in love with God.  His words and His voice become all we want and all we need.  Our roots go deep and our hope is only in Him.

Today is an opportunity for me that is hidden in my disappointment.  I will not waste it.